[food|cheese] The cheese spread at Paradise Lost II

On Saturday at Paradise Lost II in San Antonio this past weekend, we took up a collection to fund a cheese spread. @dratz, @itsaJuliasaurus, @gwenthing and I then hied ourselves over to pillage Central Market on Broadway. We did pretty well by it.

Unfortunately, due to the impending hunger of the crowd upon our return, I did not have time to photograph the spread in detail as is my wont. I did, however, keep the receipt. Forthwith, here is the photo and an accounting of the fruits of land and cattle therein.

From the top, clockwise:

Mortadella with pistachios
It’s my understanding that true mortadella is illegal to import into the U.S. The bologna from hell, basically. I like it grilled.

Sopressata citerio
The closest thing to a basic salami in this spread. A flavorful cured meat that isn’t particularly challenging to most carnivorous palates.

Proscuitto di Parma (30 months)
One of my perennial favorites, though not everyone enjoys the slight muskiness of this Italian ham.

Hot capicolla
As @psursi said, this is salami for grown-ups. Assuming that by “grown ups” you mean people who like their lips to tingle when they eat meat.

Jamon Iberico
A very rich, smooth Spanish ham with some similarities to proscuitto.

Affidelice au chablis
A blended triple creme with a chablis-soaked rind. Quite tasty and rich as expected.

Chimay
Not the grand cru cheese, but their regular cheese. A good inclusion for the less adventurous cheese eater, as it is creamy and smooth and doesn’t get into fistfights with one’s tastebuds.

Delice de Bourgogne
Another triple creme. If you’re not familiar with that kind of cheese, think of this as what Philly Cream Cheese gets to be if it eats its Wheaties and says its prayers and goes to cheese heaven when it dies.

Eiffel Tower cremeux triple creme
A third triple creme, because how much rich smoothness is too much?

Mimolette (12 months)
A hard, aged cheese that is rather bright orange, with a sprightly tang.

Manchego (4 months)
Young manchego runs a bit bitter and zingy, but without the oily, crumbly texture of aged manchego.

Sottocenere al tartuffo
My personal favorite cheese, a mellow Italian with truffle oil in the milk and truffle inclusions whose flavor has a complex finish much in the fashion of a good wine.

Valdeon bleu
A mixed milk Spanish blue that kicks ass, takes name and starts fights in your mouth. Not for the faint of heart, but awesome if you’re a blue cheese fan.

Epoisses
A cheese whose rind is an offense against nature, but once you get past the stinky feet smell, tastes like butter on steroids.

Barkids moon
A new cheese we tried on a flier. Didn’t impress me, seemed serviceable enough in a middle of the road way. Flavorful.

Cantal (6 months)
Somewhat parmigiana-like French cheese that was also new to me.

Plus duck rilettes, avocados, artichoke hearts, garlic stuffed olives, salad and bread. And wine. And beer. And more wine.